Is It Time For Another Baby?
I am a content mom to two children: a 2 ½ year old boy and an almost eleven year old girl. I have stated many times, both out loud and to myself, they don’t make any other kind, just boys and girls so technically I’m good... I’m done.
I don’t want any more children because, as I have stated
before, I have my boy and my girl and they don’t make any other kind.
With that being said, my younger sister went into labor a
couple of days ago. It was a very long,
tiring and anxiety-ridden labor, and that was just for me.
I was so anxious for her, and I just wanted it to be
over. Of course, I couldn’t wait to
snuggle with that little girl. I
couldn’t wait to smell baby smell. There
hasn’t been a baby girl in our family for almost eleven years. I was anxious to get my hands on that
baby. So anxious, apparently, that I
couldn’t sleep the night she was born because I knew the next day I would be
able to finally go see her.
Was I tossing and turning in bed because I was nervous to
meet her and hold her, or was there another reason?
I mean I was pretty sure that I didn’t want another
child. I was pretty positive I was done starting from scratch and was perfectly
content raising my mini me’s from this point forward. Yes, pretty
positive indeed.
Yet, I wondered what holding this tiny baby would do to
me. Would I feel an overwhelming desire
to run home and beg my husband for another child, which for the record, I know
he would be all for or would I be content just holding and snuggling and giving
back this precious being?
So, of course, my mind started wandering to all the what
if’s and all the different scenarios my life could take on should I hear that
clock a-tickin’. This could be a game
changer for everyone in my house.
Off I went to the hospital. It was now or never, and to be
honest, I just wanted to know. Another
baby for us, or not?
The moment of truth came when my mom handed me my tiny,
not-even-24-hour-old niece. I held my breath and snuggled her and instinctively
started the good old bum pat and swaying from side to side. I smelled her baby smell. I didn’t dare look at her baby toes for
making her cold and mad. She was awake
and looking at me, and I smiled at her and gave her tons of kisses.
When my time was up, I gave her to my brother-in-law
begrudgingly and left my sister with her family. I walked out of the hospital knowing, without any doubt, that I was
very content and my family was very
complete. It felt good to know that
I was sure of my feelings.
However, I refuse to wash my sweater for fear of losing that
baby smell until the next time I get to hold her! ~April
Guest Blog Post by April Keyes, a work-at-home mom to two children;
one school-aged and one toddler. She
writes her blog, “Confessions of a
Truu Mom” in the hopes of making others smile, laugh and know that they
aren’t alone in this journey of madness otherwise known as motherhood. Check out
and LIKE her Truu Mom Facebook
page too!
This is why I don't think I'm done. Logically, I am. I've got three, I'm almost forty, my last pregnancy was horrible, etc - but I've never been able to say absolutely that I'm done.
ReplyDeleteI love the sweet side of you as much as the fun, snarky side. Much love to you my friend, great blog!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading this blog! I have four kids now spread out over ten years. During those ten years I went back and forth not knowing what to do after each baby, but finally after two "surprise" babies and getting our boy three girls later I can say I am done! We feel blessed!
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